The Painting

The ocean, the surf, the sand, the footprints, the blue sky, the distant clouds;

all were rendered to perfection,

so much so that as I allowed my imagination

to be drawn into the impressionist’s rendering,

I could almost taste the salty air and feel the gentle breeze catching at my hair.

Perhaps it was because I longed for it to be that way.

My feigned senses were abruptly snatched up into the grasp of reality.

Where were the rocks, the pieces of driftwood?

Missing were the tangled globs of seaweed, dead palm fronds,

bits of weather-worn sea glass.

Was there nothing left lying around to reveal sweet memories

of sand castles, picnic lunches, Frisbee games?

Where was the lost slipper, the half-buried wristwatch,

the makeshift homeless shelter

tucked amid the thorny mesh of bougainvillea and kiawe?

As lovely and delightfully inviting as it appeared,

the painting was unrealistic…

…like my prayers may sometimes be.

Who am I

that my life would be reduced to a painting?

Am I entitled to health, comfort, kind treatment?

Am I capable of discernment?

Must my default assumption be that my struggle or lack or failure

are indications of God’s disinterest in my personal affairs,

of His punishment for my ineptitude, or of His disappointment in me?

Are the phantom portrayals and partial glimpses

of the lives surrounding me

meant to be emulated or somehow establish a standard of measurement

with which I must compare?

When I allow my imagination

to be drawn into my own artistic rendering,

I can almost taste the salty air of an ideal life

and feel the gentle breeze of self-centered optimism catching at my hair.

Perhaps it is because I long for it to be that way.

My feigned senses must be abruptly snatched up

into the grasp of God’s Truth;

that is…

to desire Jesus,

to trust in His perfect love for me,

to relinquish every holding, every title and tenure,

to count all things as loss in view of Jesus…

“But whatever things were gain to me,

those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. 

More than that,

I count all things to be loss

in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord,

for whom I have suffered the loss of all things,

and count them but rubbish

so that I may gain Christ,

and may be found in Him,

not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law,

but that which is through faith in Christ,

the righteousness which comes from God

on the basis of faith…” 

~Philippians 3:7-9

As the realities of life

are placed in the presence of the true reality, that is Jesus,

there are no illusions of hopelessness….

…and there is rest.