Petitions

She describes her situation

with enough accuracy to persuade,

but there are hints of self-deception,

maturing of illusive pretext;

like a softly done make-up,

sweet in its first impression.

The depths of her eyes speak otherwise.

Sincere intentions and earnest prayers

began in truth

but have been nurtured in her desire for safety at all costs,

eventually leading to thorough explanations

and petitions offered in self-defense.

She wants approval.

Her desire is to hear,

"That's great!  I'm so happy for you."

But I cannot say those words.

The undertones of looming destruction

drone with undulating dissonance

in sobering anticipation.

The unknown quantity,

her core motivating factor,

has yet to be revealed.

It's not just her, Lord. 

I am quite familiar in my own experiences

with this type of creeping transformation,

toe-dipping over the line,

redefining truth in my own mind

... all within the clever disguised of prayer.

When does prayer become sin?

...when they become petitions

offered in my own defense?

...when I explain my needs,

set the agenda

and design the expected outcome?

...when my will collides

with that of the omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent God?

If I am honest with myself,

I will ask Him...

The Hard Request

"Lord teach (me) to pray..."

~Luke 11:1

It is the hard request

because it requires true submission of my heart,

relinquishment of my perception of control,

my refusal to yield to distraction,

my focused quietness before Him.

And when He speaks to me

the answer which I already know by memory...

"When you pray, say:

'Our Father who is in heaven,

hallowed be Your name.

Your kingdom come.

Your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our debts,

for we also have forgiven our debtors.

And do not lead us into temptation,

but deliver us from evil.

For Yours is the kingdom

and the power

and the glory forever.  Amen."

~Matthew 6:9-13

...reassurance of His presence will be made known

perhaps as a quiet whisper,

or like sheets of wind and sleet,

or like light shining through a keyhole,

or simply like a the gentle touch and assurance of strength

from a comforting arm around my shoulders.

"These all with one mind

were continually devoting themselves

to prayer...

And they prayed and said,

'You, Lord, who know the hearts of all men,

show us."

~Acts 1:14,24

"...striving together

for the faith of the gospel..."

~Philippians 1:27

"Beware of the dogs,

beware of the evil workers,

beware of the false circumcision;

for we are the true circumcision,

who worship in the Spirit of God

and glory in Christ Jesus

and put no confidence in the flesh."

~Philippians 3:2

"The Lord is near. 

Be anxious for nothing,

but in everything by prayer and supplication

with thanksgiving

let your requests be made known to God. 

And the peace of God,

which surpasses all comprehension,

will guard your hearts and your minds

in Christ Jesus." 

~Philippians 4:5-7